What every young Adult should know before marriage

It is the 21st century! borrowing notes on relationships seems so impossible. Getting a good wife/husband is becoming almost impossible. There are so many blogs and articles trying to convince us of what is going wrong with the current marriages. Where divorce is the order of the day!

However, there is no manual that will guide you appropriately on how to get a good spouse. The journey to finding a spouse needs a lot of learning too. We tend to be so irrational when it comes to love issues. For instance, when every woman says she loves a tall and rich guy and you get approached by one! and there you are, saying you got the love of your life?

This post is going to guide you appropriately on what to be conscious about before falling into the pit everyone else falls into. What every young Adult should know before marriage:

1. Are you ready to get married?

Sometimes, people marry out of societal pressure! Your parents and relatives have been on your nerve. Always asking you when are you getting married. Trying to find spouses for you, and in the process, you fall into their trap. First of all, know what you really want. Search your heart, your soul, your everything, and know if you are ready to take that responsibility.

For some, they just start by getting kids, and in the process, they get married or separated. Readiness includes a lot of things like finances and even the ability to accommodate someone in your heart and life. The traditional way works sometimes. If you have set yourself with the right mindset, you will plan for everything before. Be careful who you get children with, it is good to take control of your life.

Marriage should come before getting children. Take your time and be wise not to complicate your life. You see some people complain about the choices, they made. You got children yet you never wanted to be a mother or a father. You see, some things need a lot of thinking, what do you really want?

2. School of thought of your spouse

This includes religious beliefs, how a person views life, or simply what are his or her thoughts on various things in life. For instance, if you want to have kids in the future, don’t assume that the person you are dating wants the same. Ask those questions. Where your spouse sees himself in the next five or ten years.

Sometimes religious differences can be a great hindrance leading to divorce. If a pagan, marries someone who is a staunch believer in his religion, they may end up with lots of internal conflicts. Some things it is a matter of observing, for instance, it is very easy to identify someone with a growth or fixed mindset. Even the belief in sex before marriage is also a factor to check on.

Sometimes it is better to be on the same page with your future spouse. People never take this into consideration until they start living together and discover that their differences are too much to contain what every young Adult should know before marriage is that both mindsets matter.

3. Differentiate between being loved and being used

Currently we have a trend of gigolos and gold diggers who seem to be the perfect match!There those people who will show up in your life, and they seem to benefit more in the relationship.

signs to look out for

1. You are always giving in the relationship. Maybe you buy them gifts occasionally and you have never received anything from them. You always give them compliments, but they hardly notice you or your progress.
2. They are so obsessive. Some people think this is love, that their fiancee can’t get their hands off them. That anytime they see them they want to sleep with them. Or they are always tracking your phone. Such a relationship bleeds into a lot of insecurity. This is common and has contributed to murder cases. Such a spouse that makes you feel deep down something is not right is a red flag.
3. You always feel ignored. Love is mutual, it is not right to feel unwanted in a relationship. Don’t force issues sometimes it is right to take a break in such a relationship. If it does not work out, walk away something that does not build you might break you.
4. You always feel like an option, not a priority. The partner rarely communicates with you. If you are not someone’s priority, it means maybe you are dating someone with another partner
5. Not being with you in bad times. Users are there to benefit from you, once things start going haywire and they run away

4. You should be ready to love and commit

What every young man/woman should know before marriage is that you should be ready to persevere. If you love one another you should be ready to try to make things work. Remember this is a scenario where two different people choose to accommodate each other.

A partnership, calls for a lot of learning and understanding. First, know your partner for who he is or she is. Both of you can make adjustments to accommodate each other. Never marry someone you got zero liking, respect, trust, or love for because it will be hard to commit. The Marriage Encounter tells couples that they should do all it takes to win back love.

5. Visit a counselor before marriage

If you identify the spouse of your dreams. Ensure you do not start the rush. You may have taken your time to find a suitable spouse and towards the end, you find yourself so impatient, that you just want to live together.

Trust the process, the counseling session may seem expensive but it is worth trying. Some people separate after this session, others will have a bond relationship because they will know what to expect in their marriage. Do not mind the outcome, because it will not kill you. You will have a lot to learn from each other. Marriage is often ignored, take your time to learn from the experts. The marriage counselor will refer you to literally materials that will guide you appropriately.

6. Be Mature

Maturity is not all about age. It comprises a lot of aspects. For example, you are respectful, honest, patient, and grateful. Relationships have so many steps that need a lot of consideration. First, ensure that you are both friendly. Both of you can discuss anything, if you wanna spend the rest of your lives together, what should you not discuss?

If you are mature enough, check out your partner’s level of maturity too, in this way you will both be able to live with each other. Be mature enough to check out the character of a person instead of their physical features. Be Mature enough to know how to stick in one relationship. Patience pays. In conclusion, read What every young Adult should know before marriage often.

Sometimes, you see people posting pictures and videos, on how to be a good husband or wife. Don’t fake your life to please people. Make sure you choose someone who chooses you for who you are other than trying to fake life to fit in someone’s life.

Nothing is too complicated, we complicate lives. If you are not good for each other, don’t force issues. Make sure in your entire dating life, that you are honest and you are very real. This way you will never regret it if things do not turn out right. Five important lessons that your children should learn from your divorce

What every young Adult should know before marriage is not everything, study the right books on Marriage. Avoid those people who are so negative about Marriage, they may end up discouraging you. And finally before agreeing to marry a person, ask questions about health or whether they are married or have other children. Be sure of who you are marrying. Factors youths should consider before marriage